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I’ve decided to experiment with online exercise videos, which might not have been the brightest idea. These videos present some interesting challenges, and I’ve stumbled upon an important personal question: do I, Ruth Crilly, have the humor of a teenager? Am I immature, or do others find themselves giggling at the cheeky commentary during these sessions too? It feels like a game of innuendo bingo! It’s especially noticeable in videos from the U.S., where instructors often seem oblivious to how their words might be interpreted.
Here are some highlights from the workout videos I’ve been trying out this week:
“Wow, I can really feel that in my booty right now, guys. It’s deep, I feel it deep inside my butt.” (Glutes exercise.)
“Ooh, that feels good in my butt right now!” (Plank with mountain-climber moves. It’s not surprising that most people quit exercising after January.)
“Mmmm, okay, now let’s pump it, pump it, pump it, PUMP!” (Sumo squats with a “pulse” at the bottom. I’ll share more about “pulses” in a future post when I’ve come up with enough colorful language.)
I must mention, these remarks are made breathlessly by women in form-fitting outfits. While there’s nothing wrong with this, both the visuals and sounds can be a bit distracting. It’s tough to balance on one leg, stretching your arms “like an airplane,” when you’re stifling laughter at the commentary.
Honestly, I find the term “pump” funny in most contexts, regardless of accent. Depending on where you’re from, “pump” might translate to trump, parp, or, as I call it at home, a bottom burp. It’s unfortunate since “pump” is quite a versatile word used for many things, like a petrol pump, air pump, or pumping up the volume. I’m fine with these except when it refers to the action itself. I’ve filmed so many ads for beauty brands where I’ve had to say things like: “do two or three pumps into the palm of your hand!” or “spray two pumps onto your face and breathe deeply to inhale the scent!” These always get me.
Back to the “feel it deep inside your booty” crew: do they realize what they’re saying? Is it intentional humor to lighten the workout mood, or do they think most viewers aren’t as childish as I am? If you have answers, let me know. And happy Easter! I wanted to write something more thoughtful about fresh starts and gratitude, but this seemed more pressing.